Gently stretching the inner fabric of my being
While intentional stretching different groups of muscles, inherently other will become more tense. It is like moving the load from two sides, only to one, provoking a creative disequilibrium with the purpose to release the tension from inside and to convert it in something with positive outcome. Strangely or not, a lot of emotions emerge at the surface of my awareness, while trying to stabilize an unbalanced posture. On the same time, I realize that in common experiences I persists to stay in uncomfortable positions, even for hours, without realizing it and provoking a lot of damage to my body-mind being. Tense situations always appear without my intention. But the forbearance is built in paying attention, moment-by-moment, to the strain induced to the inner fabric of my being, with the clear determination to smooth the sharp sensation of afflictions. It is curious that many tension tried with intention will reveal uncovered holes in the sole, from where powerful thoughts and emotions are coming out, stirring my world of imagination. But letting them go, like the dust carried by the wind, is the best thing I can do, without regret or fear.
Multiple resonance between different parts of the mind-body system
The anatomical parts of our bodies are close related to each other. Just noticing a discomfort in a part, will generate a tension in reply from another part. It is like a sound wave that bounces between different walls of the same room, and with each change of direction, it is strongly amplified by the surrounding energy, a process that happens in the electrical resonant cavities. Indeed, I imagine my body like a very complex room, with myriads of objects that communicate and hold together in a whole complex and beautiful living organism. Also, a muscle tension might change its nature, while travelling through the mind-body system, becoming a sensation inside the nervous system, then changing again in a muscle tension placed at a long distance from the originate place in another organ. Also, by multiple bouncing, this perturbation might jump at the level of perception, even stored as emotion, feeling or thought into different parts of the mind. Reversely, an emotion, feeling or thought, even an attitude, might transmute into a perception, or even a muscle tension, one or many, depending of her content, that means, the message carried by her. I noticed this jump of tensions and sensations that have come to my awareness, while performing a simple body scan, insisting on that essential tensions that I remarked as travelling inside this beautiful complex state of being alive.
A narrow path on the crest of a mountain
It is normally to counteract against the pressures acting upon you. So I feel, while staying unmoved in the middle of the storm created by the world outside of me and that strong turbulence coming from the world inside of myself. In reality, where I am? Outside or inside? In noticed that my habit is to run in the outside world, when something bad is happening inside. Vice-versa, when there is something unpleasant outside, I have the tendency to run into my world of fancy imaginations, built step-by-step from the years of my childhood. But where really I am? Remaining mindfully, I identified only a narrow path on the crest of a mountain as depicting the way of “who am I” question, passing between two sharp abysses: the outside and the inside world. To step on this path, I must adopt a mindful stance, being aware that acting wrong could produce a full damage to my being. This narrow path is not quite straight. She is curling again and again even if there are no visible obstacles. Also, her aspect is changing according to the time that is passing like a wind that modifies the terrain she is travelling by. But remaining mindfully, I almost automatically, that seems a paradox for me, I sense and discover the right way where this path will appear again in a strong game of illusion and reality.
Tears dropped from other times
The fresh air passed with a strong blow from a forgotten open window. But I remained in calmly scan my body, noticing how my mind is reacting by thoughts and emotions. The wind was cold and humid announcing autumn. I noticed a profound calm sensation traveling my mind and creating powerful warming of my hands. Also, a strong emotion, like a vibration, emerged somewhere from the top of my head and spread throughout the whole body by multiple bouncing inside me. Images from the past aroused into my mind. Sensations from other times have come into being with the some aliveness like in the past. I looked to them, superposing their perception in my awareness over the clutter of my body scan, and it was like I was child again, lying on the bed in my room, in the time when my parents were still together. Some tears dropped from my eyes. The image was very strong. It was like living again that period. I knew it was only imagination, but very often, I’d rather that the good part of her to become reality and to live again the years that has passed so quick from my life.
From the cockpit of my global perception
My attention is distributive, allowing me to track several concurrent phenomena producing in the same time. I imagine my awareness like a complex cockpit, full of different instruments and tools, from where I view the world, outside and inside, projected in a kind a panoramic screen with multiple cameras mixed on his framework. For instance, I notice effect of a strong stretch or twist inside my body, but also, I hear the blended noise of the street and the voices from my relatives moving in the house. Almost simultaneously, I feel the smell of a good meal coming through the window from my neighbours living two floors below me. And also, a beautiful image of an oak tree, the Bach flower essence I used to drink daily, is included in the background of all this global perception. Of course, many other details are present there, but now, these are the main headlines from the story of the moment that is passing now along with me. For a second, I realize that the whole human technology might be the result of expressing outside of us some part of the complexity perceived inside of our mind-body marvellous system.
Being at home into this vast and infinite universe
Today it was very hard for me to concentrate on the task of scanning my body-mind system. Strange connections with the noisy environment around me affected my clear and focused view, necessary for a good perception of the reality as it is manifested inside and outside of me. But I resisted to the temptation of changing anything. I persevered in watching the things as they were and in tracking to my best the flow of events while passing around me. Therefore, I noticed the powerful sensations aroused by the hazardous sensations and feelings. If I could convert a part of their energy to supply something better, it would have been a great achievement. If somehow, similar to a hydroelectric power plant, I could capture the pure energy of chaos to nurture the foundation of my body-mind order, which would provide the needed strength to build my awareness toward the present moment and the immanence of my being. Also, I noticed the flow and reflow of the blood inside their capillary vessels, while carrying the precious oxygen to the cells, in one way, and capturing the carbon dioxide from them, in the opposite way, carrying the debris of consumption to the detoxifying organ involved in gaseous exchange, i.e. the lungs. This come and go flows, repeated in the rhythm of the heartbeat, were for me a good antidote against the hazardous sensations induced from the outside world and deep resonated into my psychosomatic system. This essential rhythm I noticed everywhere afterwards, positively altering my view upon the ultimate purpose of life. This last experience produced in me a powerful joy, accompanied with warm feelings of being accepted as I am into this world, that so become my sweet home now and forever, where I am, irrespective of times or places.
Mindful perception is a strong ally against dark influences
Being awake from the early morning, I had plenty of time to practice stretching, body scan and mindful Wu-Shu movements. Also, I had the occasion to confront a tension that periodically is coming in the middle of the night, avoiding me to rest. For the first time, I looked with a clear focus inside the vortex of its insidious power to influence my body-mind system. It was strange to enter into the mud of dark thoughts and discouraging feelings, whispering in a choir suggestions intended to undermine my self-esteem. With the sharp perception developed in my previous sessions of mindfulness, I was able to trace and identify the origins of this negative mixture that caused me negative disposition for a long time. Without trying to escape, I drank the bitter pot of these feeling till the bottom, and surprisingly, I felt better in controlling my emotions. In realized that mindfulness offers a powerful stronghold against dark influences and also, it enables me to escape from the angst of the past and the worry of the future. In the same time, I understood that a mindful perception may be a strong ally against any kind of dark influences coming both from inside and outside of me.